This book is really
moving me. I think this book was the EXACT fit to have to read nearing
the end of this long journey. It is really helping me examine my own life
and I find myself relating to it almost every page. I have kept a Word
document of my favorite quotes. I have been so incredibly busy this past
year, I have bought my first house and I will have completed graduate school
all in the same year. Both of these have taken up all of my time after
work, that I have seemed to "loose myself" in the process. I
have been thinking for weeks what I am going to do next, since I feel like I am
not going to know what to do with my time. I think the next step will be
to "find and improve" myself. I am not unhappy in any way, but
I know I can do and be better. This book is so motivating and is just the
right thing to start me on that path! I especially need to learn to
remember the Rule Number 6.
I think that I am going to pass on this chapter to my administration and
see what they think about implementing it in our environment. I think
that it would be a great thing to remember throughout our very hectic days.
I have also realized that I need to find my central self because I
almost always react with my calculating
self. I over analyze almost everything in my life and go back and
forth questioning a decision a million times. I always try have other
people make decisions because I am always afraid I will choose the one that
will make someone or others unhappy. But I guess that leads to learning
that you cannot please everyone.
I hope others are finding this book as moving as I am....
Regardless of the changes I would like to incorporate in my life, here are some of my favorite lines that I feel will help me become an even better person:
I hope others are finding this book as moving as I am....
Regardless of the changes I would like to incorporate in my life, here are some of my favorite lines that I feel will help me become an even better person:
“Humor and laughter are
perhaps the best way we can ‘get over ourselves.’ Humor can bring us
together around our inescapable foibles, confusions, and miscommunications, and
especially over the ways in which we find ourselves acting entitles and
demanding, or putting other people down, or flying at each other’s
throats.” (80)
“When we practice Rule Number 6, we coax this calculating self to lighten up, and by doing so we
break its hold on us.” (81)
“When one person peels
away layers of opinion, entitlement, pride, and inflated self-description,
others instantly feel the connection. As one person has the grace to
practice the secret Rule
Number 6, others often follow.” (89)
“Mistakes can be like
ice. If we resist them, we may keep on slipping into a posture of
defeat. If we include mistakes in our definition of performance, we are
likely to glide through them and appreciate the beauty of the longer
run.” (102)
“Abstractions that we unwittingly treat as physical reality tend to
block us from seeing the way
things are, and therefore reduce our power to accomplish what we say we
want.” (108)
“Downward spiral talk is based on the fear that we will be
stopped in our tracks and fall short in the race, and it is wholly reactive to
circumstances, circumstances that appear to be wrong, problematic, and in need
of fixing.
“Focusing on the
abstraction of scarcity, downward
spiral talk creates an
unassaible story about the limits to what is possible, and tells us
compellingly how things are going from bad to worse.” (108)
“The more attention you
shine on a particular subject, the more evidence of it will grow.
Attention is like light and air and water. Shine attention on obstacles
and problems and they multiply lavishly.” (108)
“Speaking in possibility
springs from the appreciation that what we say creates a reality; how we define
things sets a framework for life to unfold.” (110)
“We start from what is, not from what should be; we encompass
contradictions, painful feelings, fears, and imaginings, and- without fleeing,
blaming, or attempting correction- we learn to soar, like the far-seeking hawk,
over the whole landscape.” (111)
My Comment:
Kristen we all need to remember “Rule #6” modified for some
of us of course. I think that every time we react to our “calculating self” we are
serious about our goals and our focus. I think that we become calculating
because it becomes our way to survive in world where everyone seems to be
calculating. But I see that’s why “Rule #6” makes people stop and take
notice…it’s different from how others are acting or reacting. This difference
causes a change in you, which in turn causes you to be different. In your
response, I detected a little downward spiral in your conversation. You used
“but” instead of “and”. You have accomplished so much in this extremely busy
year “and” you bought your first house “and” graduating from Full Sail also.
You are so alive with the enthusiasm of life. Keep telling yourself that. To
quote or re-quote the source of one of the Zanders sayings, “Speaking in possibility springs from the appreciation that what
we say creates a reality;…” source quote, Proverbs 18:21, “Death and life are
in the power of the tongue:…” Meaning; what we say positively or negatively out
of our mouths will make a difference in positively or negatively affecting our
lives. If you profess unhappiness then you will be unhappy until you profess
something else. This is what the Zander’s are simply telling us.
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